Farewell, My Love
Farewell, My Love
That was that then. The 2021/2022 season is (pretty much) over.
The Week In Ball
Well. What a season. I'm not sure I can remember a season like it? I'm sure there have been good ones before and better ones to come and yeah, recency bias is definitely a thing but man alive, it's been exhilarating.
My teams have given me heartache, pain and an enormous amount of joy, as has Football Twitter, but I wouldn't change it, it's been a ride.
So, let's round up the last week of league football in the main European leagues and also check in on a few cups that were decided last week...
Europa League
Seville became Little Frankfurt and Little Glasgow for a couple of days last week. The final itself was on Wednesday, between Eintracht Frankfurt and Rangers. It was a pretty good game, seen some people say it wasn't great quality but the atmosphere was incredible (the pre match choreo by the Eintracht Ultras was unreal) and both teams really went for it.
Rangers scored first, a lovely goal from Joe Aribo, sending the Glaswegian contingent, including Ally McCoist on punditry, into raptures. It was followed 12 minutes later by a goal from Borre for Eintracht. And that was that. Extra time followed but the deadlock couldn't be broken, so it was penalties.
The penalties were fantastic. Strong, confident. That was until Aaron Ramsey walked up to the spot. My stomach fell, my heart began to pound. I desperately wanted Eintracht to win but like this? Yes, it happened that that. Aaron's weak, nervous penalty was saved. Eintracht went on to score the ones they need and it was over Eintracht Frankfurt were Europa League Champions. And it was well deserved, they dispatched with Barca, West Ham and were unbeaten in their pursuit of the trophy. They're a great club , with great support and, well, they have Kevin Trapp, what else is there to say?
UWCL
Next we move onto the showpiece fixture of the Women's calendar, the UWCL held at the Juventus stadium in Turin.
Juggernauts Barcelona Femini and Lyon contended to receive the prize of a frankly beautiful trophy.
I think everyone assumed Barcelona were going to walk this. Yeah Lyon are strong but have you seen Barcelona Femeni? After only six minutes though Lyon were one up with a fantastic goal from Henry. This was followed by one from Hegerberg and Macario on the 23rd and 33rd minutes. Frankly they could have had more too.
Of course Alexia pulled one back on 41 mins but it wasn't the start of a comeback. Lyon held tight and ended as 3-1 winners and tool the title from Barcelona following their wholesale destruction of Chelsea last year.
Ligue 1
Of course the title was decided a while back but this last weekend saw the fight for survival as well as for European places.
Monaco were held to a draw by Lens in a crazy match that I watched on Saturday evening while a four nil win by Marseille meant they crept up into the Champions League spot, leaving Monaco in the UCL qualifying spot. Rennes go into the Europa League, along with Nantes as cup winners, and finally Nice into the Europa League qualifiers.
Metz and Bordeaux have been relegated with St Etienne in the relegation play-off which they play against Auxerre this Thursday and Sunday.
La Liga
As with Ligue 1, La Liga was sewn up before coming into the final weekend. Europe was pretty much decided too and we have Madrid, Barcelona, Sevilla and Atleti into the UCL, Betis and Sociedad into the UEL and Villarreal into the Conference.
At the other end we bid farewell to Granada, Levante and Alaves. I am too tired to work out who's coming up so, there'll be three more teams eventually. Maybe Eibar? Almeria? Valladolid? It's a mystery.
Bundesliga/Germany
The Bundesliga finished last week and I went through what happened then.
This week however we saw Dortmund dispatch with their manager of just one season, Marco Rose. It's both a surprise and not. I didn't see it coming but Dortmund, despite finishing second, haven't been up to scratch. For more info I recommend Lewis Ambrose's German Football newsletter which explains it in much greater detail than I have.
On Monday BVB announced that former interim coach Edin Terzic would be taking the helm permanently. Dortmund did well under him and he's local, he's passionate, he's cute (sorry) so I'm happy with the appointment.
Serie A
In Serie A, as with the Premier League, the title race went down to the wire. It was a contest between two halves of once city. Could Inter retain the title, or would it be Milan winning their first Scudetto in 11 years.
It was in Milan's hands, sitting at the top of the table with a two point cushion all they had to do was draw or win, even if Inter won Milan had a better head-to-head record so the title would be theirs. And well... they did it in style.
On the 17th minute the beautiful, resurgent, elder statesman of the team, Olivier Giroud scored. Then he scored again on the 32nd minute. Franck Kessie rounded off the goals with Milan's third on 36 minutes.
Inter did their bit, winning against Sampdoria but this was Milan's night and boy, did they make the most of it.
Elsewhere Salernitana avoided the drop after Cagliari failed to beat Venezia. It was quite lovely seeing the Salernitana players huddled around phones in the dugout waiting for the results.
This meant that Cagliari, Genoa and Venezia will be down in Serie B. Lecce and Cremonese are now up and the playoff between Monza and Pisa will be this Thursday and Sunday.
In the European places we have Milan, Inter, Napoli and Juve in the UCL. Lazio and Roma in the UEL and Fiorentina in the UECL.
Premier League
Well. Well well well. What a couple of hours that was. A day of utter insanity, of ups and downs, confusion, excitement, depression. It had it all.
Let's start at the top. Liverpool needed to win. City need to do anything but lose, and hope if they did, Liverpool didn't win (goal difference would've meant a draw would have given the title to City as well).
Within 3 minutes Pedro Neto had scored for Wolves. Liverpool hearts shattered. Maybe they weren't going to get the league but to lose it like this?
On 24 minutes, Mane slotted home. 1-1. Game on.
15 minutes later came the news. I gasped, quietly, at my phone (LiveScore is quick). Moments later my Liverpool supporting husband saw the screen update on BTSport Score playing silently in the corner of his iPad. 1-0 Villa. Could it be about to happen?
On the 69th minute (nice) another goal. But for who Chris Kamara? FOR VILLA. From COUTINHO. The narrative. Liverpool were still languishing at 1-1, fighting and fighting hard but nothing was going in.
And then, as quickly as hopes were raised, they were extinguished. Three goals in quick succession, Gundogan 76, Rodri 78, Gundogan 81. Bam. Bam. Bam. It was done. Liverpool clawed back two goals thanks to Salah and Robertson to at least win but it wasn't enough. It was never going to be enough. So City were crowned champions. Their fourth title in five years. I can't pretend I like it or was happy for them but they are a machine. A Gulf State enabled machine yes, but a machine nonetheless. And if nothing else, seeing Jack Grealish drunk and happy is always a joy.
At the other end of the table it was between Leeds and Burnley to see who was going to go down. Burnley started the day in pole position, just, due to far superior goal difference, needing to better Leeds' result. The rarity of table positions changing on the last day must've given them hope. (If there's one thing you need in football it's hope).
In Leeds' game there was a disallowed goal before Raphinha put the Whites ahead from the penalty spot. Brentford equalised with comedy consequences as Sergi Canos (scorer of Brentford's first Premier League goal and what was to be their last) ripped his shirt off in joy, got booked, then immediately fouled someone at the restart and was sent off.
Up in Lancashire Burnley were 0-2 down to Newcastle thanks to a Callum Wilson brace. On the 69th minute Cornet pulled one back but even a Leeds draw was going to be enough if Burnley couldn't equal or better their result. And that was how it seemed it was going to go, until up popped Jack Harrison with a 90+4 winner for Leeds. There was utter pandemonium. Jesse Marsch fell to the floor, Raphinha walked the length of the pitch on his knees and then got up in the crowd. Leeds were safe. I was glad, I've never liked Burnley and I have a real affection for the current incarnation of Leeds.
In the fight for Europe I think we all knew nothing was going to change, and it didn't. Arsenal and Spurs both thumped 5 past Everton and Norwich respectively, Brighton beat West Ham to scupper their Europa League hopes and put them into the Conference and despite losing to Crystal Palace, this was enough to keep United in the remaining Europa League spot.
In the dead rubbers, Chelsea beat Watford 2-1 in Mike Dean's last game as a referee. Kai Havertz getting a disappointing Mason Mount haircut, Ross Barkley scoring in the year of our lord 2022 and Ben Chilwell coming back were the headlines from that game. Finally Leicester beat beleaguered Southampton 4-1. For my money Ralph Hasenhuttl might be the first managerial casualty of the close season.
Finally, Salah and Son shared the Golden Boot, Son being the first Asian player to win, and Alisson and Ederson shared the Golden Glove.
So there we have it. Bar the playoffs, Conference League final and Champions League final the 2021/2022 season is over. What a riot it's been. I'm an Arsenal, Dortmund, Milan and Barca fan so I can't say I've loved every minute, there has been pain but even with that it's been truly fantastic. Thank you to everyone who's made it brilliant, be it my boys on and off the pitch, you guys, my pals on Twitter (many of whom I've managed to subject to my irl presence this year), my husband for letting me have control of the remote, the pundits, armchair critics, bloggers and podcasters and yeah. Someone hook me off the stage before this gets silly😁
Football 'eritage
At the end of every season (and indeed of every cup competition) you can be guaranteed of one thing over and above anything else and that's a montage.
Usually sound tracked by a bland, middle of the road song per the below fantastic thread from Mayowa Quadri that's been popular in the last year or so the montages show us all the fun, sad, exciting, funny and iconic moments of the season, culminating of course with the winner of whichever contest the montage is celebrating holding the cup aloft and cheering.
Here's a couple from Sky that I could find. The Match of the Day one doesn't seem to be online but of course you can always iPlayer it if you want, same with the Football Focus one which was brilliant.
The {Offside} Thirst Trap
I realised on Sunday, quite late on, that I hadn't even considered who was going to be the Thirst Trap this week. So at the risk of boring everyone and myself I'm going to present an inaugural Thirst Trap of The Season award.
This wasn't difficult to decide and while I know you can already see the picture of who it is I'm sure you could've guessed given oooh, about half a second to think about it.
Yep, it's Christian Eriksen.
I have been utterly overwhelmed by my crush on him. I am old, I'm married, but he makes me feel like a teenager. I want to put posters of him on my wall and stickers of him on my notebooks. I feel funny and self-conscious when I hear someone say his name. I have a folder on my phone solely dedicated to pictures of him (for balance I also have one of Jose and one of Kermit). Maybe one day I'll even work out our FLAMES score or our LOVES score. You're calling the police aren't you? I get it... I'd be embarrassed if it wasn't so much fun. Honestly, if you don't have a crush you need to get one, they're the best.
Also let's not forget that last Summer we thought he may never play football again and yet here he is, back and at an impressive standard. His story is amazing, heart-warming, beautiful.
He also starred in my number one favourite moment of the season: when he fouled Brandon Williams and got... a hug for his trouble. Just completely adorable.
2021/2022 Honourable Mentions
So this is a small selection of players I'm always happy to see and watch but I'm not sure they're entirely worthy of a full Thirst Trap nomination? Call these the Also Rans of the season (sorry lads).
Mathias Normann - formerly of Norwich, now going back to his parent club in Rostov, in Russia - he's got a beautiful face and a ridiculous body, his insta is fun, but that's where it ends for me.
Rodrigo Bentancur - at some angles I think I've got made, then I see him on the pitch and I think no, no, you were right.
David De Gea - I was told off on Twitter when I mentioned that I might fancy but... the heart wants what the heart wants and the heart wants an extremely long faced, Metal loving, fed the fuck up goalkeeper way past his best.
Robin Koch - Koch, fnar... No but *Frank face* seriously, he's tall and cute and German. What more do you want?
Conor Gallagher - another one who I sometimes see and think I've gone mad but I just find him really pretty and appealing. I think it's the eyes and the hair.
STOP THE PRESSES. This is a long one this week, a multiple Thirst Trap but this is important.
Jack Grealish for the Face. That is all.
Merch Stand
There's only one thing to mention here isn't there? NEW ARSENAL HOME KIT.
It was revealed (though it has of course long been leaked and indeed already featured here) with a truly superb video, as always.
They team wore it for the final game on Sunday and as I said when it was first leaked, I don't like a collar but I bet it looks good on and boy does it. I really like it, it's got nice little design elements (the lightning on the collar for e.g.) while remaining a classic Arsenal shirt. I just think it's super classy. Fingers tightly crossed for the pink kit to have been real now too.
City also released their new kit and despite not much liking blue kits and especially not liking pale blue ones I actually think it's pretty nice! Round neck: tick. Maroon trim: tick. Not bad at all.
Extra Time - A Few Things I Loved in 21/22
Hector Bellerin's loan to Betis
God it's been lovely. He's THRIVING at Betis and god I hope he stays there. Obviously I'd have him back at Arsenal in a heartbeat but what I want most is for him to be happy.
Jake Daniels Coming Out
It's wonderful to have an out, currently playing footballer. There are loads and loads of articles you can read about this including a couple I've linked to below.
Chris Deeley on not making Jake a spectacle
Amie Cripps on protecting Jake at all costs
Zlatan's Free Kick Against Roma
I love this free kick so much. There is a slight scuff but the way it goes so low and true and beautiful.
Real Madrid Remontada
I've written about this before but seriously, what an EXHILIRATING night of mad mad mad football.
Aaron Ramsdale: Troll
Ramsdale has been such a great addition to the Arsenal squad. It's definitely fair to say his game has gone off the boil towards the end of the season but just look at this trolling. I love his spirit and his attitude. He's so great.
Christian Eriksen Comeback
Literally just this. You all know what I think about it, lol.
Fans Back In The Stadium
Can you actually believe we played an entire year pretty much without them? Across all competitions? It all just seems utterly mad now doesn't it? Even with the increase in pitch invasions (I'll write about that next week, I wanted to keep this issue entirely joyous), politicians getting in a tizz about coke use on the terraces, offensive chanting and a few horrible situations, would you take them away again? Never ever. It's so so wonderful that they're there.
Genuinely Exciting Title Races
In Italy and England anyway. Who doesn't love final day excitement? Brilliant stuff.
Finally here are some of my Best Threads from 21/22, nothing like a bit of self-promotion eh? ;-)
Thank you as always for reading! I'll be back next week and then I think a small break before the Nations League and the Women's Euros! Have a great one!
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