I Guess That's Why They Call Them The Blues
I Guess That's Why They Call Them The Blues
Kick Off
Yet again, I was, unfortunately, having what I believe is known as A Life Outside Football this weekend so my viewing and indeed my knowledge of the fixtures on Saturday and some of Sunday was limited.
What I did manage to do though was watch approximately 20 minutes of the Arsenal game on crappy train wifi where the picture only clicked into crispness every so often before going back to some kind of impressionist view of the match.
Frankly, as an Arsenal fan this was the best way to watch it. On paper a team at the top of the league should be nailed on to beat a team in a relegation fight but we all know that doesn’t always track. Especially not when the team in question has a new manager and it’s at a proven bogey ground for the top placed club.
And so it was that Sean Dyche careered back to the Premier League with a win. It wasn’t pretty, Arsenal were very poor and we need to learn from it and quickly. We may be at home next but we’re against an in-form Brentford and tbh I won’t relax now until the final whistle blows on the last game of the season, or at the point before that where we secure the league.
Elsewhere Liverpool’s woes continued with, by all accounts, an abysmal performance against Wolves. This leaves them in 10th, although they have a game in hand over Chelsea above them and two over Fulham in 8th. The only problem is that their next game is against Everton’s Dycheball, although the saving grace is that it is at Anfield.
Speaking of Chelsea they, despite their extremely exuberant spending in the January transfer window and having many of their injured player back, were something of a damp squib against Fulham under the lights of Stamford Bridge on Friday. The game ended 0-0 although Fulham should have taken something from it. Enzo Fernandez was a silver lining in Chelsea’s performance that included a woeful appearance by Mudryk.
Fulham looked good though and Kenny Tete put in a blistering performance.
To quickly round up the rest: United beat Palace although lost Casemiro to a stonewall straight red after putting his hands around Will Hughes’s neck; Brighton beat Bournemouth, Brentford beat Southampton in a game that, coupled with his post match comments, has put Nathan Jones’ position seriously at risk; Leicester beat Villa in a 2-4 thriller (maybe? I didn’t even watch MOTD tbqhwy) and finally in the evening kick off Newcastle drew with West Ham.
On Sunday Leeds fell to Forest who are currently on a great run, although Leeds were also pretty bad, despite putting on new boy, Juventus loanee Weston McKennie and record signing Rutter. They’re in danger and Jesse Marsch is showing them ‘motivational’ series on Netflix. Hold the phone, he’s been sacked according to my only news source, Twitter dot com.
Then it was Spurs v. Manchester City. Probably because he was so tired from the journey and putting the team together with one eye open, Pep left De Bruyne on the bench, with not a care in the world for FPL managers, and after 16 minutes Kane scored and North London, all of North London, went wild.
Apart from the ~*implications*~ Kane became Spurs’ all time goal scorer and what a wonderful time for him to do it. I for one have never had a bad word to say about him and have never called him boring or said his celebration made me want to die.
By some miracle (not an anti-Spurs statement just… you know what City are like) Spurs held on and for a brief window maybe everyone was happy? Not City fans of course but North London for sure. Possibly United fans? Anyone who enjoys schadenfreude.
And so Arsenal’s 5 point lead is kept secure for another week. One game at a time, one game at a time.
On the continent I’ll start by saying I have literally nothing to say about Ligue 1. I have no idea what happened there at all.
In the Bundesliga, for a brief, glorious moment Union Berlin were back on top after beating Mainz 2-1, but Bayern fought back yesterday, beating Wolfsburg 2-4 and reclaiming their crown.
Elsewhere Dortmund went a goal up halfway through the first half then, in true Dortmund faashion, conceded on the stroke of half time. Knowing what they’re like I assumed they were in for another loss but they rallied and managed a 5-1 win, with five different scorers, one of whom was Sebastian Haller, scoring his first competitive goal, his first goal in front of the Gelbe Wand, since coming back from his cancer treatment in what is such a feelgood, moving story.
This put Dortmund 3rd and it’s tight up there but it’s hard to consider it a ‘title race’ when Bayern are top and don’t look much like shifting, especially with Cancelo now in their ranks who’s already provided two assists in two games.
In Serie A, Milan, poor woeful Milan, lost the Derby Della Madonina to Inter 1-0 in a league that frankly, is all but over, with Napoli now 13 points clear at the top with no signs of slowing down.
And finally in La Liga, Barcelona are starting to pull away after Real Madrid lost to Mallorca and they dispatched with Sevilla 3-0.
Briefly, in the WSL Chelsea made it past Spurs, 2-3 (with an amazing Lauren James goal) and they’re now clear at the top after Arsenal and United drew.
Half Time
I’m going to ignore the other big story from last week involving Mason Greenwood. I’ve said my piece on Twitter and that will do. (Actually a quick thing, I just saw a tweet saying that Nike have dropped him as sponsored athlete to which I say what? You’ve dropped him now?!?! He’s been a Nike athlete all this time?!?!)
Instead, as I’m writing, there’s breaking news that Manchester City are being charged by the Premier League for over 100 breaches of financial rules following a four year investigation. BT have confirmed that “the club will be examined between 2009/10 and 2017/18, with a focus on different campaigns re: revenues, managerial contracts, FFP and Profitability & Sustainability.” That’s a lot of different areas and a hella lot of charges.
What this will mean for them, for the league, no-one yet knows. I’m thinking about Juventus in this trying time and having a nice little chuckle to myself.
Full Time
Licha’s dog celebrated his third birthday yesterday and I died a little bit 😭
After Harry Kane became Spurs’ all time top scorer, Sky decided to post this absolutely cursèd image
As mentioned. Sebastian Haller scored his first competitive goal for Dortmund this weekend.
Shirt of The Week
There’s only one choice this week, a range rather than one shirt, and it’s Adidas’s 23/24 Jamaica kit with Wales Bonner.
Just look at it! It’s so nice. Let’s start with the away kit. As I always say, you can never go wrong with a black kit and this backs up my theory. I love that it’s completely plain, other than the lovely stripe detail and the Wales Bonner logo on the back. Gorgeous.
The home kit is vibrant and stylish with a lovely pinstripe pattern. There will be inevitable comparisons with Norwich but that’s also a great kit!
The standout items for me though are the track jackets. There’s the plain, flag based one seen above. Classic, clean, no messing. Then there’s this one.
I mean… FUCK! Look at it. LOOK! Isn’t it just gorgeous? And it’s REVERSIBLE. Wear it that way round and it has a lovely yellow lining for a peak and pop of colour. Do a switcheroo and it’s a bright, block colour jacket.
The pre-match jersey is also lovely, coming in the same print as the track jacket but in a different colour way.
Frankly, even the socks (and the away shorts) are good.
Thirst Trap
Not one single Thirst Trap this week, but instead a little round up of some of the notable movers and shakers during the January transfer window. Maybe one day one of them will get their own entry, who knows.
Let’s start at the top of the financial tree with Enzo Fernandez. He’s a baby but he’s a cute one. He’s just got a nice face you know? He’s sweet.
Bournemouth have done well, bringing in both Matías Viña who gets added to the pantheon of Hot Uruguyans and Antoine Semenyo from Bristol City.
Leeds brought in Georginio Rutter who really is a baby, I had not realised until I googled, anyway he also has a nice face and really couldn’t look more Leeds if he tried.
Wolves have upped their Hotness stakes (which tbh aren’t that bad anyway, Neves, hello) with the loan signing of Matheus Cunha.
So there we have it. Another week in football done. I have no plans next week so will be available to watch all the football, lord help us all.
Oh oh, one last thing, if you’re in London on Thursday and have £25-30 and an evening spare do come to the Stadio x Wrighty’s House x Counter Pressed show in Kings Cross on Thursday. Tickets here.
And if I don’t see you there, see you next week!